From someone who wondered why people have kids to someone who wonders why didn’t I have one before ? Motherhood has changed me a lot in the past three years after becoming a mom.
Motherhood is a life changing experience and believe me no book, no movie , no advice or no words can prepare you for what lies ahead. There are some things you understand only after you have experienced them. Motherhood is EXACTLY that ..
It as if your whole world changes and more importantly who you are, what you believe in, what you like, how you look like and everything else changes. No wonder people say that being a mom is like being reborn.
Its difficult to put into words how I have changed after becoming a mommy.
So here are few points I could collate to talk about How motherhood has changed me or my perspective towards life
I make a conscious effort to not judge people
Only the wearer know where the shoe pinches.
I had heard this many times. But this is something I have become much more conscious of after becoming a mom. I used to unknowingly judge other people specially moms before I was a parent.
But now I actually make an effort to not judge people. We can never know what are their situations, what is driving them to do things they do.
Of course every mom wants best for her kid. So there is no point judging.
Before I became a mom I had a very fixed view on how things should be done. But now I have come to accept that different people may make different choices based on their situation and there is no ONE right way of doing things. So to each its own.
I have come to realize that one of the most underrated virtue in today’s world is – Kindness. Wish to see more kindness in the world and want to be more kind to others.
Have become very emotional.
Oh yes! That is a big change in me. I have definitely developed some new tear glands.
Before becoming a mom, I used to wonder why moms cry so much in movies. But I am exactly in the same situation right now.
And I am accepting it here and saying this out loud for all moms who are reading it – You are not alone.
If you are reading this and have become much more emotional or feel like crying at small things, then don’t worry there are other moms just like you (including me) and in the same boat.
Have gone from size small to size Large
There was a time when I could eat anything and still remain the same size. I could buy clothes without worrying how will they LOOK on ME. Gone are those days !
I had become huge during pregnancy, after that I have lost some weight but apart from tell tale signs on my body of an operation, I have changed physically in a lot more ways.
And to be honest I have accepted the new me.
It took me time to get used to being larger than I was. To understand what clothes to buy now (which by the way i am still figuring out). But I feel all this does not have as much meaning that it had then.
My habits have changed dramatically
Earlier I used to eat to live. And I am not sure what exactly has changed and why ? But I have become a foodie.
Before becoming a mom, I used to sleep when given a chance, Now whenever I get few minutes, I think about what to write. I have actually cut down on my sleeping time so that I can do other things that I enjoy more.
Another thing that has changed is, I have started looking at food in terms of its healthiness quotient. Not that I don’t eat unhealthy. Of course at times I do! but I am just mindful of the fact that I am eating unhealthy.
And another noticeable difference is that now you won’t find chips, biscuits and/or canned juices at our home. For someone who relied on these as quick snacks, now I make efforts to not introduce these food options to my toddler.
Also Read – How to inculcate healthy eating habits in kids
I do not want to watch news
Nowadays, watching news reminds me what a grim world we are living in. There are crimes against kids – rape, sexual exploitation, murder, kidnapping and what not.
Before becoming a mom, these news did not impact me much. I used to be sad but not to an extent that I am now. Now every time I open a newspaper, I get scared for my kid.
I am scared when I send him to his playschool. I wonder where should I relocate to in order to give him an environment that is safe. Should I go outside India ? Even if I do that – we will still be outsiders on a foreign soil. What should I do to give him a pollution free environment? What can I do to feed him food that is unadulterated ?
These questions did not bother me till 3 years back. But nowadays, these questions are always lingering at the back of my mind.
Its as if my life and my heart is outside my body.
Have learnt a lot and am still learning
I have read and learnt more in the last few years than I ever did. After becoming a mom you are a continuous learning curve. As your kid learns new things so do you.
I have analysed, researched, googled and experimented with almost everything you could think of after becoming a mom,From my son – Of yes! I have learnt a lot from my toddler. How to quickly forget things that don’t mater. How to find magic in little things for e.g. the wonder in his eyes when he first saw that water comes from tap in case if you turn it around. How to love unconditionally. How the price of things don’t matter and so much more.
And with whatever I learnt, I continued trying to help people by sharing my experiences either via by writing blogs or answering their queries. So I can definitely say I have become much more helpful than I ever was.
Honed multiple new skills
After becoming a mom I have started multi-tasking in ways that I never knew existed. With a toddler, a job and a passion of blogging I need to manage my time very well to be able to do multiple things.
Another skill that I have learnt recently is negotiation.
Babies and toddlers are the best managers I have seen in my life. I have done much more work than I ever did in office that too in exchange of a smile and a hug 🙂 ..
I have reconnected with myself
I have reconnected with myself after becoming a mom.
I have started doing things that I loved, started taking pleasure in little moments in life and have been reintroduced to wonder and magic in my life (via the eyes of my toddler).
I had forgotten how much I liked writing while I was in school, had forgotten my love for plants and flowers and did not have time for painting and crafting.
Now I have started a blog where I write about whatever I learn during this journey of life, have my own space of green and flowers in my balcony, have a shelf full of crafts and activities that we (me and my toddler) do at home, and have a great family where we are creating memories everyday.
Also Read – How to start a blog in India
I have made multiple new friends who actually are my support group for anything and everything.
Are you a new mother? Do check out this article on Flawless and Glowing: Skincare Tips for Moms Dealing with Postpartum Skin Challenges
Have learned to live and experience life
Before becoming a mom I was going to the office, delivering multiple projects for my company, at times working on the weekends or after office hours. Of course, I was traveling and doing other things but I actually believed that going to the office and working was my life.
Even when I was expecting, my main worry was how will I spend time while I am on maternity leave ? And as a result had thought of starting a business or doing something different. I had actually told my manager that I will be back in 3 months.
And Do you know when did I rejoin office? AFTER 11 MONTHS and that too part time.
After becoming a mom, I realized that there is so much more to life than just going to office. I have experienced love, fear, and joy in the form which I never knew existed.
I love seeing my son grow and take pride in each and every milestone or accomplishments 🙂 ..
After becoming a mom I realized that going to office is a part of my life and I have a life and a world beyond that.
Also Read – My Parenting Mantra
I have become a better version of myself
I have become much calmer, more peaceful, accepting and much happier than I ever was. I have discovered a ‘new me’ who has loads of patience (as my husband reminds me – please note this patience is reserved only for my son).
I don’t get too much bothered by messy home, plans being changed and am able to take toddler tantrums and exhaustion in my stride.
Being a mom has definitely made me a better version of myself. I am a happy mom who will not have my life in any other way.
That was my little piece on How I think I have changed after being a mother. There are many more moms who are sharing their stories.
Do let me know in comments how Life has changed for you.